What do Americans have against the French?

As I prepare to study abroad in France next quarter, the most common response I get when I tell people where I will be is the question, "Why?" For some reason unbeknownst to me, there is great animosity between Americans and the French.

My boyfriend Mike is the biggest protester of the French. Any word I speak in the dreaded language elicits a distinctive "ew" and a cringe.

His biggest complaint about the French is that they are rude. Having known a rude French foreign exchange student in high school, he uses any opportunity he gets to tell everyone, including my mother, a high school French teacher, just how bad he thinks the French are.

My other friends seem to share his opinion and frequently question why I want to spend ten weeks in a country that hates Americans.

Granted, I've heard the rumors that the French don't really like us. I am fully prepared to handle any amount of rudeness that the French I meet might dish out to me.

But are the French really that bad? After all, the French have made great contributions to American society. Too often, in our haste to shun our European neighbors, we overlook the things they have given to us that have made our country so much better. Here are just a few of my favorites.

10) Better coffee flavors. I'm not exactly sure what makes French vanilla different from regular vanilla, but I like it. I plan to buy a big cup of it at every cafe until I find that Jean-Luc guy.

9) More interesting lunch sandwiches. Can you imagine eating processed American cheese for the rest of your life? French cheeses inspire Wisconsin's finest to give us something real (and edible). Just stay away from the goat cheese.

8) Perky salad toppings. That zesty dressing the French invented tastes so much better than Thousand Island or ranch.

7) More interesting breakfast foods. Even though I don't like syrup, I can't help but admire what the French have done to toast. With just a little strawberry sauce on top, this perfectly browned bread is a little piece of heaven.

6) Deja-vu. Deja-vu. How many times have you felt like you've done or seen something before? Without the French, this somewhat psychic experience would probably be nameless.

5) Wine. You don't get much better than French wines. California tries really, really hard, but it still pales in comparison.

4) Berets. This cool little hat has been the key feature for several militant organizations. But whether green, black or even hot pink, the beret can make anyone look distinguished.

3) That big lady with the torch. And they say the French don't like us! What better way to say thanks than a reeeeally tall green statue. We liked her so much that we stuck her in the harbor to let her welcome all our new immigrants.

2) The potato revolution. Since the advent of the "french fries," the potato has never been the same. This golden Francophone contribution almost single-handedly supports one of this nation's greatest industries - fast food. Without the French, Ronald McDonald would probably just be the scary clown from "It."

1) Better kissing techniques. Without the French, kissing would be so boring.

The French really aren't as bad as Americans think they are. After all, isn't French the language of love? Don't the French influence most American fashion trends? Even Jimmy Buffett thinks the French are cool.

Maybe they are a little rude to Americans at times, but I think they're entitled to it. We're a nation full of rude subcultures (case in point: New York cab drivers) but none of us seems to mind.

So to Mike, my friends and all you other French-bashers out there, the next time you feel like you're eating the same french fry for the second time, remember who made it all possible.

Dahlberg, crime reporter for The Post, will not return from France until she finds a waiter named Jean-Luc.